October 29, 2013

Embracing Your Place in Life

Ah - that age old challenge.  Knowing where you are and comparing it to where you had been before and where you had thought you were going to be.  Looking at where everyone else is (at least, where it looks like they are at from your viewpoint), and comparing it to your own reality that just can't measure up.  And somehow, you are supposed to be happy with that.  We are told time and time again that no one's life is as perfect as it looks so stop comparing.  You won't always be where you want to be but you can be where you should be, so stop wishing you were somewhere else.  Embrace your life and be happy about it.

It's a lot harder to do than it is to say, and much harder to tell yourself than to tell it to someone else.

Embracing doesn't have to mean you are happy with where you are at though, at least, you don't have to be happy with it all the time.  That's an impossible goal and does more harm than good to shoot for.  Yes, I am saying it.  You won't always be happy with where you are in life and will in all reality probably be unhappy with it more often than not.

You should, however, try to find some level of peace and contentment.  At the very least, come to an acceptance of the fact that this is where your life is at and it probably isn't as bad as you might think.  Are you happy every time you give someone a hug, no matter how much you love that person?  Anyone who has been told by their parents to "say your sorry and give your sibling a hug!" knows that happiness rarely accompanies that embrace.  You didn't have to be happy when you gave that hug, you just had to do it.

A few years ago, I was at a private college, on my way to a four year degree, exploring a new life and enjoying every minute of it.  I loved the school, I loved the people, I loved everything about that.  Then it all fell apart and while I could see that God was the one tearing up the papers I'd started to write my life's story on, to this day I still have no idea why.  I ended up with a different life that I hadn't planned on, and God was like my parents saying "okay, now you have to give it a hug".

I didn't want to, believe me, I did. not. want. to.  I dragged my heels and glared and pouted and refused to embrace the direction my life was taking.  I sat in a corner of my mind for a long time, with no desire to explore different options, no interests, no plans, no goals.  I got a part time job and said "That's it.  I don't want to do anything else and you can't make me."  God let me do that, with the occasional reminder that "Hey, you aren't off the hook - you still are going to have to embrace your life."

This past year I slowly began to realize that I couldn't stay in my corner pouting anymore.  I began to slowly uncross my arms from across my chest and look at what had been going on around me.  I was finally able to drive up to visit my friends at school without crying on the way too and from, and I knew that I could move on.  I didn't know where I was going to go, but I was able to finally make the first tentative move to embrace my life.

Now I am enrolled in my community college, working towards an associates in a field I am excited about.  I am finally embracing my place in life.  I wasn't completely happy about it when I did, and there are still days when I look at what other people are doing, when I think about the fact that I would have been a graduating senior this year and I think "do I really have to be giving this hug?"  But I do, because it doesn't matter if I'm happy about it all the time.  What matters is that I give the embrace anyhow, that I realize that this is my life and if I don't embrace it no one else will.  There are other areas in my life that need embracing too, and it's a struggle at times.

But the good thing is, when you give in and embrace your life, God will come up behind you with a smile and embrace with you, whispering "See, isn't this so much better?"

1 comment:

  1. Love this, Amanda, and passing it along to a friend who's going over some life potholes. Bless you! <3


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