July 30, 2008

Have Ye Heard Tell O' The Time Jack Was Marooned...

"My dear friends, let us not forget our dear friends, the cuttlefish!"
Love that line. Today mates, I shall share with you all a fanfiction I wrote based on an idea that my dear aunt Q on the forum had. In her luv'ly story, bonny Jack found himself in the position of havin' ta take his niece, Eliza on his ship... against his will and inclinations. My story picks up right after Jack relents and takes Eliza on board. Enjoy mates!


“So Miss Eliza, what thinks ye of the Black Pearl?” Gibbs leaned against the ships railing next to her.

“I love it!” her eyes brightened. “Where did Uncle Jacky ever get such a gorgeous boat?”

Gibbs winced a bit, wondering what the Captain would have to say about being called ‘Uncle Jacky’. He cleared his throat, “Well, let’s just say Miss, that’s a rather long story.”

“To long for right now?”

He coughed again. “Aye, miss. A sight too long for right now.”

“Well, if you’ll tell me a shorter story about dear old Uncle Jack, I’ll sing you a song.”

Gibbs sighed, “A story, right now?”

“Right now, please.”

“Very well.” He sat down heavily on a large rum barrel, but his eyes had just the hint of mischief in them. “Have ye ever heard tell about how Jack was marooned for three days and three nights on the Island of Misfit Toys?”

Eliza’s eyes widened. “Where is that at?”

Gibbs searched the sky, “Um, it be way up north, where it snows a lot.”

“Oh,” She nodded. “What sort of place is it? It doesn’t sound too pleasant.”

“Aye, that it’s not.” He shook his head. “It’s a terrible sad sort of place. Ya see, that be where all the toys who are a bit odd, so to speak, get sent. No one wants them.”

Eliza looked indignant. “Why, I’d want them, even if they are odd. And there are plenty of children who have never had proper toys who like them too. Besides, living at sea, with pirates, sort of gets you used to oddities. Not that you are odd,” she added hastily. “I like you all so very much.”

“Would you like me to continue me story?”

“Oh yes, of course. I am sorry.”

“So ya see, there be where all the misfit toys go, like John-in-the-boxes, Rudolph the Blue Nosed Reindeer, dolls that only close one eye… well, ye get the picture. So anyhow, there be Jack, marooned on the island, where the winds be howlin’ and the snow be blowin’, and not a soul in site.”

“Where were the toys?”

“Well, they was hidin’. The captain doesn’t look very much like the kind of folk who’d be playin’ with toys now does he? So, naturally, they was frightened.”

“So, what did Uncle Jack do?”

“Well, he stood ankle deep in the water, for those three days and three nights, till all manner of arctic creatures came a-crawlin’ into his presence. Then on the third day, he roped himself a couple of sea lions, ran a cord through their mouths like the reins on a horse, and rode them all the way to Tortuga.”

“Really?” Eliza breathed. She thought, “Well, what did he use for rope?”

Gibbs thought. “Well, now let me see…”

“Human hair,” said a voice. “Off my back.”

Gibbs leapt to his feet, spluttering. “Captain, sir, I didn’t hear ye. Excuse me sir, I was just telling your niece hear about the time, that you, er, um, were, marooned, um, sir.”

“Yes I know. Which time?”

“The time you were marooned off the Island of Misfit Toys, Uncle Jacky. Why, have you been marooned more then once? And what about the toys? Who marooned you there?” Eliza rattled out.

Jack looked curiously at her. “The Island of what?” He looked at Gibbs. “Mr. Gibbs, what have you been telling my bonny lass?”

“Excuse me, Captain, I’d best be seein’ to my duties.”

“Slander and calumny! Come back, sir and that’s an order! I want to know what bloody stories you’ve been spreading this time….”

Eliza watched her uncle chase after the unfortunate first mate, then shrugged and turned back to the railing. “Yo, ho! Yo ho! A pirates life for me!”


I do sincerely hope you liked it mates.
Dead foxes have no tails! (So you should be glad I'm alive, or where would you get such stories?)

~ Captain Fox Turner


  1. that was really cute. I liked Eliza calling him Uncle Jacky. Have you written any other fan fiction.

  2. Catherine MorlandJuly 30, 2008 at 11:45 AM

    POTC meets Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer - lol

    Very Cute!

  3. Incidentally...

    Did you know that the costume that "Captain Fox Turner" (aka Orlando Bloom) is wearing was based off of a costume worn by the great swashbuckler Errol Flynn?

    (I think it was from "Captain Blood" - but I'm not sure!)


    The Black is not actually piratical at all - it was an invention by Robert Louis Stevenson in Treasure Island!

    "Beat to quarters, Mate, and clear for action!"

  4. Oops!

    Ok you caught me!

    I forgot to proof-read my last comment - argh!

    I meant to say:

    The Black Spot is not piratical at all.

    (Hoist the mainsail!

    Tote that barge lift that bail - swing it!)


Welcome, and thank you for taking a few minutes to share your thoughts with me! I do love reading all and any comments. =] Please note that I do moderate, and any comments that do not meet with my standards and approval will be deleted. Thank you!